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25 reasons why India should nuke the PRC

ACHTUNG! : This section is merely intended to be a parody about certain topics relating to the PRC. This is by no means a hate propaganda so please don't sue my broke ass. Thanks.

THE REASONS

1. The rest of the world wouldn't have to put up with the crappy quality of their technology products, especially computers.

2. So that you wouldn't go psycho, hitting random people in the heads with a battle axe after finding out that shit you JUST bought, upon spending all your hard earned money doesn't work, because it is Made in China.

3. So that the rest of the world doesn't have to bother introducing the golden word "QUALITY", leave alone "QUALITY CONTROL" into their vocabulary. This could fucking take a while and we really don't have that much free time on our hands.

4. So that my fucking blood pressure doesn't go to 2,000/1,500 after my damn PRC made hard drive crashes for the nth (I lost count) times eventhough I JUST fucking got it!

5. So that we don't have to hear them bitch and whine about the ABM (Anti-Ballistic Missile) system developed by the US all day and night. It's gettin' old already.

6. So that airforce pilots, whose countries import Chinese aircraft, don't have to be assured that they are closing the lid of their coffin when they close the lid of the cockpit.

7. So that they stop pissing us off.

8. So that you have the assurance that the people involved in the assembly of your product aren't prisoners working naked on toxic chemicals.

9. So that we can materialise our "Look East" plan and expand eastwards.

10. So that we can fuck all our neighbours once this obsticle is out of commission.

11. So that my grandson will ALWAYS greet me by saying "Happy Diwali" instead of "Gong si fa choi"....

12. So that the rest of the world does not have to put up with those "MiG wannabes"(Q-5, J-7 etc)...they really suck ass and the casualty rate of PRC made planes (NON COMBAT) is like 46%!!!

13. So that Arab countries would no longer have to buy weapons and ammunition from them. This is one of the main reasons why the Israeli-Arab war was lost- NOT because of Soviet weaponry but because of the use of PRC weapons and ammunition.

14. So that a tourist does not have to rot for eternity in a hard labour prison camp for finding a dead prostitute in his room or for banging general Chiang's daughter.

15. So that the rest of the world can carry out the phrases "DEMOCRACY", "FREEDOM OF SPEECH", "FREEDOM FROM FEAR", FREEDOM OF RELIGION AND CUSTOMS, "FREEDOM FROM HAVING YOUR ASS RAPED BY THE POLICE BECAUSE YOUR SHLONG WAS AIMED AT 35 DEGREES AND HAD AN ERECTION RATE OF 12.6% while pissing" with more meaning.

16. So that our western neighbour will deal with us in a more diplomatic manner. The hell, just as India-Pakistan begin talks, the PRC is quick to rush in weapons, nukes and tech. to the Pakistanis so that they are encouraged to refrain from diplomacy and pursue their stupid ass dream of becoming stronger than India.

17. So that the rest of the world doesn't have to put up with bullshit contradictions in politics. What, you HONESTLY expect me to believe that the PLA REALLY stands for the "Peoples Liberation Army"...??? MY ASS! Liberation from what??? Liberation from having to live in this three dimensional material world to the greater spirit world? I don't see any other forms of "liberation" the PLA has done and well, if "liberation from the three dimensional material world to the spirit world" is the main task of the PLA, why don't we make their task easier by simply dropping a few nukes their way?

18. So that the Kashmiri rebels and Pakistani army stops thinking that they are Chinese. Shit, looks like the PLA put these two groups of people into some sort of a hypnotic trance.

19. So that the rest of the world doesn't have to drink horse piss that they call Quing-Tao beer. DO YOU BELIEVE THIS SHIT COSTS MONEY!?!??!?! No one deserves to be tortured by drinking this shit.

20. Double Happiness. This shit ain't right. Yet the world is infested with these fucking crappy cigarettes you can buy for like 29 cents a pack. With an Indian nuke, the world will be FREE of this fucking contageous crap.

21. So that you wouldn't have to get spat upon in your face and listen to a barrage of insults in a high pitched sonic boom like voice(you don't get intimidated by hearing these fucking insults- you just get pissed and wish you had a 30mm gattling cannon) once you start bargaining for prices in markets.

22. So that we wouldn't have to fucking hear about that damned bombing of the Chinese embassy in Belgrade. Hearing this crap over and over just makes you want to fucking take a battle axe and throw it at the damn TV! The FUCK, why don't they just come to grips with reality: shit happens.

23. Just for the fuck of it.

24. Aaaarrrggghhh! I'm running out of reasons. Well, why the fuck not?

25. Aaaaaaah! I'm down to #25 already! Yippie ka yay! Well, testing our nukes on PRC is a lot more efficient than testing them on the Pokhran desert.